The one question I get asked most often is “How do you do it?” At the heart of this question isn’t really the need for information about how I do something, but the idea of comparing what someone sees as my “perfect” way to their way that looks chaotic, messy, or out-of-control to them. Comparing yourself, your family, your style to anyone else’s is immediately setting yourself up for failure because you are not them and because what they present to you on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, etc is only the perfect-looking version of their life that they have decided to release to the public.
Let me start by saying nothing I suggest works perfectly, even in my house. There are days when assignments don’t get finished, chores are left half-complete, people yell, toys get left out, and on and on…
The first key to juggling it all, holding it all together, is to realize I cannot hold it all together. “There but for the grace of God, go I” rings true in our home. If we didn’t base our lives of fundamental guiding Biblical principles and a relationship with Jesus, everything would absolutely fall apart into total chaos and confusion, and even with that it still does some days! But even with these basic principles guiding our family, we still mess up. Systems in place to help us still fail because we are human, and at our core we are imperfect.
The second key to juggling it all is to recognize that your family, your personality, your season of life, is different from anyone else’s. You cannot copy exactly what another family does. Even if you did everything exactly as I have posted, your results will be different from any other person’s because you and your family are unique. Whether chores or homeschooling, finances or cooking, you must pick and choose what works for your family and throw out the rest. Try my suggestions. If they work, great! If they don’t, try something else. If you have found something that works well, share your ideas with the rest of us. The idea is not for you to follow everything I say to do, but for us to work together to come up with ideas that we can all use to help manage our families.
As wives and moms, we are all over-worked, under-paid, and often under-appreciated. Part of that goes with the job, but part of that we bring on ourselves by comparing our worst to the social-media best image of our peers.